Why do I lie? 

This is a really personal post for me and something that I have never spoken to a person about ever. This is the only platform I feel comfortable enough in venting it so excuse the immature writing style. 

Ever since I was tiny, I have told lies. Mostly little lies, embellishing stories and when there was actually 10 people at the party, when I retold it there were 50. Seemingly harmless and perhaps to some degree, something that most people are guilty of. 

But as I have got older, the lies have got bigger, sometimes stories that are totally fabricated. The reason I am writing this is because it scares me, and I want to know if anyone else does this and what I can do to stop. 

I genuinely genuinely don’t intend to lie. The first time I hear the lie is when it has already come out of my mouth and I normally spend the next 10 minutes thinking to myself: “why did I say that? That isn’t true” 

I have no idea why I do it, whether it is something to do with wanting to be involved in conversation and having something to say or whether it is something deeper that I am not aware of, but I hate it. 

I sometimes catch people looking at me as if they know it’s a lie and that makes me really hate myself. 

I have literally just done it for absolutely no reason. A friend of mine was robbed (this is true!) and had an expensive mixing desk stolen. I have absolutely no idea how much the desk is worth but when I told my parents I said: “he had a £300,000 mixing desk stolen” and as soon as I said it, I realised how ridiculous a number that was but I genuinely don’t think about it, it just comes out. 

I really hope that some of you can offer me some help and guidance because I really hate this. 

Thank you! Xoxo 

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8 thoughts on “Why do I lie? 

  1. DM says:

    First, I have to tell you. I really REALLY appreciate your vulnerability and courage for opening up.. So I hope you get lots of insight and answers for putting yourself out there like that. Secondly, while I don’t struggle with that particular “impulse” to the degree you’ve just described, I have my own set. 😉 One piece of the puzzle when it comes to lying or anything like it, is that the more we do an activity, the more we will repeat it..it becomes a habit… the good news is, habits can be unlearned, (although not without some intentional work initially…. someone described it to me like this.. the more I behave in a certain way, the pathways in my brain become stronger…like a well traveled path… or like groves in a record. so if you want to stop something, you need cut new groves in your response…While I would not say lying is an “addiction” in the traditional sense of the term, there are components of it that remind me of an addiction. something that has a strong hold on me. Here’s a quick article I just grabbed off the Internet that talks about breaking an addiction…(and the amount of time and energy that may be required to retrain your brain. Good luck! DM

    http://www.duffysrehab.com/blog/articles/how-long-does-it-take-to-break-the-habit-of-addiction

    Like

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